Most of my closest friends are “conservatives”. Many of them are smart people who think about other people, try to do right, and are good and friendly people.

But when it comes to politics they’re wrong. There’s no way to sugar-coat it. I’ve had to track down and expose lie after lie emailed to me (John Kerry and Jane Fonda photo – FRAUD, Gore’s sayings, you know the ones that Dan Quail actually said – FRAUD, Obama a Secret Muslim –FRAUD), so now its time to turn the table…. Its time for me to break it down for you and tell you all how you’ve been bamboozled, and how the GOP and Democrats (mostly the GOP) have perpetrated a FRAUD on you, and you fell for it hook line an sinker

Members of the Republican Party are the biggest bunch of wimps I’ve ever come into contact with. They’re scared Ted Kennedy’s going to make it hard for them to get a doctor’s appointment. They’re scared Hillary Clinton is going to raise taxes on the rich. They’re scared two dudes kissing is the reason Rush Limbaugh’s been married 3 times.

Most of all, Republicans are scared like a little baby that 2 guys drinking goat milk, living in a cave in Afghanistan are developing a thermo-nuclear warhead. They’re scared that if we don’t kill people that didn’t attack us on September 11^th, 2001, that in three months, we’ll live under Sharia law.

Yep, you’re all a bunch of woosies. You want the government to protect you from the “Boogie man” like Sadam (Don Rumsfeld had more contact with Saddam than Osama did), a former first lady, and some guy named Chip that just wants to make his toenails match his belt.

I’m here to say I was right about:

1: The War In Iraq – We never should have gone, and we should have sent 1 million troops if we did
2: The Bush Economy – You are lying to yourself if you think we’re better off than we were In 2000. And you’re stupid if you think it’s because of September 11^th that we’re in the position we’re in.
3: Tax Cuts: This was actually a credit. Tell your children you are sorry (when they get back from Iraq), because they’ll actually be paying this one, and that I told you, and you knew better.
4: The Patriot Act – The Government has totally ignored the 4^th amendment. YOU NEED TO READ THIS, ITS IMPORTANT:

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

The activist judges in The Supreme Court that think the Constitution is a “living document” really had to stretch to violate our rights on this one. It’s a good thing they had you scared of camel-boy, or you might have grown a pair and protested this, even on this one.

I write this with the hope that maybe one of my “conservative” friends (you know conservative like Ronald Reagan, who raised taxes 7 times in 8 budgets, conservative like pro-life, anti-gun Mitt Romney, conservative like President Bush II, there’s not enough internet to go through him) will wake up and stop being the pawn of the GOP.

I’m not saying you should vote Democrat. I’m not saying you should vote at all (you kind of screwed things up, I’m not sure I trust you with my country right now), but at least stop being so freaking stupid.

Those of us who really pay attention mock you when you’re not around. Thanks to you, that might be illegal soon.